So - I admit it. I am a Lost aholic. I love that show. And there was a point in my life where I could say that I didn't watch a lot of tv. In fact, my first apartment didn't even have a tv. But now I watch at least one show a night.
So, if there are other Lost fans out there - please tell me that that ending was a dream. Some big Dallas recreation. It really can't be real.
As an update I am feeling a little better - no longer crying myself to sleep at night but still feeling pretty damn exhausted by life in general.
But in typical freakin fashion - life has dealt another another obstacle - my mother in law.
Generally you won't find me complaining about my mother in law. I love her and she loves me. We have a great relationship (and I believe it helps that she lives in Newfoundland and I live in Ontario). My infertility has challenged our relationship. She is a very well meaning person who wants to empathize with my pain. Unfortunately, she doesn't know what to say so she ends up saying shit like "You are just trying to hard", "If you relax it will happen" or "If you stop trying and adopt you will get pregnant".
I know she means well and just wants me to feel better but these comments make me feel like being infertile is my fault. That somehow if I laughed more and stressed less I would have a baby already. As a result, I sometimes avoid her phone calls. For the last two weeks I have avoided her phone calls because I have been feeling down. I have tried to explain to her subtly that these comments are misinformed and hurtful but she doesn't understand.
Last night she called to talk to Rick. Friends of ours from home have also struggled with infertility, did lots of treatments and are now adopting from China. I believe that talking to them has helped her understand what we are going through a lot better. We ask about them a lot because they have been waiting for their baby for over a year now (their date has been extended twice but they have finally been told they will get their daughter in December).
So you know where this is going. Last night she called Rick to say that our friends are pregnant. They just fell pregnant accidentally and acidentally are due in December. I am happy for them I really am. But I am not sure that I will ever be able to talk to my mother in law again because holy mother of god now I will never be able to convince her that for every couple that get pregnant when they "relax and forget about it" there are 20 more that don't - you just never hear their story.
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I hope they always stay this close!
2 comments:
I hate that people just don't understand. It is so frustating.. my biggest pet peeve is "if you adopt you will get pregnant" - ugh - just thinking about it make my stomach hurt. The statics are so low but no one cares because the media thrives on it.. ugh.
I hope that your MIL will get better and start to understand.. I wish there was a class we could send these people to.
I don't watch lost, I have never seen it so I am lost. i don't watch much TV. I feel so left out.
Yep, my Mom knows both a "We adopted and then we got pregnant twice" couple and a "We had 6 miscarriages, I only have one tube and the doctors told me it was impossible but I stopped treatments and know we have twins!" couple. I have to explain again and again that yes, those things happen, but for every story like that you hear there are hundreds that don't end like that, but people don't tell those stories. Sorry you have to deal with this, dumb comments always hurt and it's terrible that we have to educate the world on infertility.
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