So, we have decided to go ahead with IVF # 2 at our clinic.
I have spoken to my IVF coordinator who assures me that I can be as involved as I want to be in my care. After each blood and wanding I wait to speak to a nurse, she gives me the days stats and usually gives me the dose (although sometimes they will call me with that later). What the IVF coordinator told me was that I see a nurse for convenience, she gets the info from the doctor but since I am paying the big bucks (and it is not being paid by provincial health care) they don't make me wait to see the doctor. However, I can choose to wait and see the doctor any day I want. If I have questions or don't agree with my dose or anything else I just need to ask and sit and wait. Also, if I don't like the answer I get, I can take it up with the director who has agreed to supervise my case.
The supervisor has also agreed that he will do my retrieval and transfer as long as he is not out of town. The IVF coordinator and I agreed that when I go in for my day 0 appointment we will try to time the start of stims so that my retrieval and transfer will most likely be a week day. I have heard great things about this supervisor.
I have decided that it is very important that I am mentally prepared and I should take advantage of this opportunity.
I am so frustrated by these base line numbers (the FSH, antral follicle count, etc). I know they are great, absolutely fucking perfect in fact. And I don't mean to whine about that but really, they were just as fucking perfect last time. And have been just as fucking perfect throughout this whole journey. Rick also has perfect sperm count (or did at least a year ago). His numbers were 120 million whole and about 80 million washed. And yet it has been 3 years, 3 medicated natural cycles, 3 IUI's, 1 IVF, 2 FETs, so much fucking sex and nothing, nada, zippo. I really would like to know what is wrong.
The only thing I can hang my hat on to give me any kind of hope that this time might be different, is that last time my E2 went to hell. It shot up to almost 13,000.00. So I am hoping that a lower dose of stims will keep the E2 in check and we will have different results.
Cause I gotta tell you, passing August 11 (my due date) without another pregnancy was very difficult and it's getting hard to imagine that this journey will have a happy ending.
I'm not Debbie Downer about this cycle though, I'm really not. No need to feel sorry for me. I'm a very good ostrich. Cycle, what cycle. All these shots and dr's appointments .... they are just more of that infertility stuff. Head down, humming loudly .... I haven't even told the old reliables that we are doing a new round of IVF. Why bother, then I don't have to answer any questions .. and when I need to talk, to get it off my chest.... I'll just tell all of you.
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13 comments:
The lower dose of stims worked absolute wonders for me as far as estrogen issues are concerned. Try to put that one worry out of your mind. Lowering stims really does solve that problem. The only reason it didn't work out for me was because of the unknown factors that have since been answered.
Sometimes all we can do is take each cycle as another piece of the puzzle. It sounds to me like your puzzle is practically put together. Being an ostrich is a gazillion times better than being Debbie Downer... and if you can't muster optimism or hope, no worries there either. I've got those covered on your behalf.
Hugs.
xoxo
You can continue to leave your head in the sand, just do what you have to - shots, ultrasounds, retrieval, transfer etc. You can leave the hope to me. I will wish and hope that this works. And remember, I am always ready for chocolate cake, so anytime you need a sugar fix, you know where to find me!
Krista - It sounds like you have really advocated for yourself and have good results with this clinic. I am glad that you will be getting excellent care and concern.
I hope that all of your efforts pay off this time. You would be a wonderful mother!!
Wow - I don't know much about IVF but it sounds like you are going to get great care. How wonderful to be such a big part of the decisions.
Maybe the lower dose of stims is just what it will take to do the trick!! Good luck with everything.
I'm glad you will be able to have an active role in your treatment. Hoping the change in dose will do the trick. Wishing you the very best.
It's amazing what asking for what you need will get you. Well done.
I'm finally getting caught up on blog reading and wanted to tell you that the news you got the other day about Dr. Comforting absolutely sucked. Regardless of whether you'd noticed anything, she should have told you that she wouldn't be there after mid-September, and why. I hope that this cycle goes well, that everything stays in check, and that this one works out well.
Hey,
I just read your previous post and, oh my gawd, that sucks.
That being said, it must feel good to be moving forward with cycle #2 despite any frustrations. Sometimes it's just easier not to dwell on the details. I'll check back and see how things are going.
Hope you had a good long weekend.
One foot in front of another. There is so little you can control once you get started.
OH GOOD! I'm so glad you are proceeding!
Crossing my bits appropriately.
Debbie Downer.
You're so cute.
I am so glad to hear you are stepping up to the launchpad (again) I might be right behind you.
Wow! I'm really inspired by you to be more assertive with all the professionals and really advocate for the best care possible. Ostrich as much as you need to! For many people it's a really effective coping strategy. Anytime you need to talk - we'll be here.
I am glad that you are going through with this cycle. It is very important to be metally prepared.
I really hope that the supervisor is really good, I also hope that she is there when you need her.
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